A few days ago I posted about my dad's health issues and how we, as a family, are coping with that. I wanted to post this update for who's interested. And also as a sort of therapy.
There has happened so much and we're constantly balancing between hope and fear. You get a small piece of hopeful news, then a smack in the face again. I have trouble remembering what day it is and what has happened when.
Yesterday I could not cope anymore with the uncertainty as my dad was suddenly released from hospital. Doctors had told him he was scheduled for a scan in the afternoon, then the plans were changed again. Of course, I was glad for my dad he could go back home (he wanted that really badly). But I was scared and stressed about it, too. What if he got another seizure? (Of course, call 911, but there's much more to the whole situation than that.) That was the main reason, but another reason was that I'm - because of how my brain is wired - quite bad at being very flexible. I know this situation is NOT about me, and believe me, I've been doing my utmost to help my family and have done what had to be done to support everyone to the point I was afraid I'd fall over. That's just what you do. You don't turn your phone off and take a day off, you're constantly "on". But trying to keep strong and crossing boundaries led to a shutdown yesterday. Tension had been building up for days.
I made the decision, which was supported and even suggested by my parents and brother, to sleep in my own home. It's a rotten situation because you don't want to leave your mom alone in case something DOES happen, but my family told me it was no use if I would crash.
My dad has had a string of appointments today and I'm yet to hear about it. I don't know when I'll be at my parents and when I can sneak in a day at my own home, it depends on what happens.
No Fitnessblender workouts for me at the moment. I walk when I feel up to it, and do "easy" yoga focused on mental health. There are times when exercise can help you to relieve stress, and times when you're just dealing with so much that even a short walk can feel like a huge task. There's so much energy going to my dad's situation, I have no strength right now to work out like I normally do.
So, that's what's happening right now.
I wish you all health & happiness and if you're in a tough situation, I wish you strength too.
Update on my dad 🌸
Hello everyone.
A few days ago I posted about my dad's health issues and how we, as a family, are coping with that. I wanted to post this update for who's interested. And also as a sort of therapy.
There has happened so much and we're constantly balancing between hope and fear. You get a small piece of hopeful news, then a smack in the face again. I have trouble remembering what day it is and what has happened when.
Yesterday I could not cope anymore with the uncertainty as my dad was suddenly released from hospital. Doctors had told him he was scheduled for a scan in the afternoon, then the plans were changed again. Of course, I was glad for my dad he could go back home (he wanted that really badly). But I was scared and stressed about it, too. What if he got another seizure? (Of course, call 911, but there's much more to the whole situation than that.) That was the main reason, but another reason was that I'm - because of how my brain is wired - quite bad at being very flexible. I know this situation is NOT about me, and believe me, I've been doing my utmost to help my family and have done what had to be done to support everyone to the point I was afraid I'd fall over. That's just what you do. You don't turn your phone off and take a day off, you're constantly "on". But trying to keep strong and crossing boundaries led to a shutdown yesterday. Tension had been building up for days.
I made the decision, which was supported and even suggested by my parents and brother, to sleep in my own home. It's a rotten situation because you don't want to leave your mom alone in case something DOES happen, but my family told me it was no use if I would crash.
My dad has had a string of appointments today and I'm yet to hear about it. I don't know when I'll be at my parents and when I can sneak in a day at my own home, it depends on what happens.
No Fitnessblender workouts for me at the moment. I walk when I feel up to it, and do "easy" yoga focused on mental health. There are times when exercise can help you to relieve stress, and times when you're just dealing with so much that even a short walk can feel like a huge task. There's so much energy going to my dad's situation, I have no strength right now to work out like I normally do.
So, that's what's happening right now.
I wish you all health & happiness and if you're in a tough situation, I wish you strength too.