In a support group for new moms that I am a part of, people were talking about how expectations for their newborn’s behavior leads to all sorts of problems for them. Reflecting on this, it is so true. Just the other day, I picked my daughter up from daycare, hoping to go grab a few things from the store after giving her a bottle in the car. However, she straight up refused the bottle and wouldn’t stop screaming. I was way more distressed by this *normal* 4 month old behavior than I otherwise would have been.
Reflecting on why, it was because I had this idea in my mind (an expectation) that she would take her bottle and I would put her in the carrier and she would smile up at me as I leisurely peruse the aisles for what I needed. It wasn’t the actual crying and bottle refusing that caused me so much distress as this has happened so many times before, but rather it was the loss of my expectation for what the outing could have been. To make matters worse, I wasn’t even really aware that I had this expectation until after this all went down.
So, this sort of thing is exactly what I designed this guided meditation for. It will provide you a template to examine your own expectations for tasks or events and question how helpful they are for you. Simply having awareness of our expectations and maintaining flexibility when the situation comes around can help to avoid or reduce extra distress caused by these potentially unrealistic expectations.
New Meditation for Managing Expectations
In a support group for new moms that I am a part of, people were talking about how expectations for their newborn’s behavior leads to all sorts of problems for them. Reflecting on this, it is so true. Just the other day, I picked my daughter up from daycare, hoping to go grab a few things from the store after giving her a bottle in the car. However, she straight up refused the bottle and wouldn’t stop screaming. I was way more distressed by this *normal* 4 month old behavior than I otherwise would have been.
Reflecting on why, it was because I had this idea in my mind (an expectation) that she would take her bottle and I would put her in the carrier and she would smile up at me as I leisurely peruse the aisles for what I needed. It wasn’t the actual crying and bottle refusing that caused me so much distress as this has happened so many times before, but rather it was the loss of my expectation for what the outing could have been. To make matters worse, I wasn’t even really aware that I had this expectation until after this all went down.
So, this sort of thing is exactly what I designed this guided meditation for. It will provide you a template to examine your own expectations for tasks or events and question how helpful they are for you. Simply having awareness of our expectations and maintaining flexibility when the situation comes around can help to avoid or reduce extra distress caused by these potentially unrealistic expectations.
Guided Meditation for Managing Expectations: Release Self-Limiting and Stress-Inducing Expectations
What are situations where your expectations have either helped or hurt you in some way? I’d love to hear your experiences in the comments below!